There are electric SUVs that glide around town looking immaculate, terrified of a puddle deeper than a credit card. And then there’s the Kia EV5 Weekender, which rolled onto the Guangzhou show stand looking like it had already done a lap of the forest and stopped only to pick up a few twigs in the grille. Finally, someone built an EV that doesn’t faint at the sight of gravel.
Start with the regular EV5: sharp, spacious, 500-odd kilometres of real-world range, fast charging, the lot. Solid family transport. Now jack it up, bolt on proper knobbly tyres, slap protective cladding all round, paint it desert beige with violent lime-green flashes, and hang a spare wheel off the driver’s side like it’s 1987 and we’re going rallying. The result is a car that looks ready to embarrass a few Land Rovers while sipping electricity instead of guzzling dead dinosaurs.
Inside, they’ve moved the giant screen towards the passenger because, let’s be honest, that’s the person most likely to complain when you decide the shortcut through the woods is a good idea. The driver gets a neat little digital cluster, a weirdly shaped but brilliant steering wheel, and a centre console that swallows weekend luggage like it’s offended by empty space. Ventilation looks tough enough to defrost Siberia. All-wheel drive, lifted suspension, silence so complete you can hear the dirt hitting the wheel arches. It’s ridiculous in the best possible way.
Kia calls it a concept, but they’ve used the “Weekender” name before and every time it quietly turns into a production model. Translation: this thing is basically already in the catalogue, they’re just waiting for the right moment to admit it. When they do, half the people still swearing by diesel defenders are going to have a quiet word with themselves.
Because this is the point we’ve all been waiting for: an electric car that can do the school run on Tuesday and disappear into the hills on Friday without once making you feel like you’ve betrayed the planet. No noise, no fumes, no range anxiety if you plan half decently. Just a big battery, four driven wheels, and the smug satisfaction of knowing you’re ruining absolutely nobody’s day.
If Kia builds it, I’m having one. Possibly in that exact colour, because life’s too short to drive beige cars that actually look beige.
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